I'm 24 and my BFof 2 years joined the CG. I want to marry him, but he doesn't want to ';ruin'; my life. Advice?

I'm graduating this May with a BS in criminal justice. I have plenty of opportunities out there, so I'm not worried. He just isn't sure I'm cut out for it. I was looking for help on what I should do to make sure I can do it and not hold anything against him. I don't care where we go as long as I can be near him.I'm 24 and my BFof 2 years joined the CG. I want to marry him, but he doesn't want to ';ruin'; my life. Advice?
I was an Army wife for 20 years and also in the Army Reserve myself. A successful military wife is one who is fairly independent and makes good decisions on her own. She sees her home as the one she shares with her husband, not the one where her parents live. With your education and maturity, you would do very well. You have to be prepared for separations if your husband is away at school or deployed overseas, but if you work and keep busy, it's not too bad. There are also family support groups in each military unit, so you have a built in support network when your husband is gone.





When a servicemember is deployed, he/she very much needs his/her spouse to take care of things at home so he/she doesn't have that worry and can focus on the military job. A happy marriage and a supportive spouse allows the servicemember to excel at his military job.





When my husband was on active duty and we were separated, we corresponded by phone and letter. However, when my son was in the Navy, it was wonderful to be able to email back and forth. Even our soldiers in Iraq and Afghanistan have access to email and the internet so communication is relatively ';live';. You don't miss someone as much when you can email and perhaps exchange video messages.I'm 24 and my BFof 2 years joined the CG. I want to marry him, but he doesn't want to ';ruin'; my life. Advice?
Listen to him -- life as a military wife is really, really hard. He may be using this as an excuse, as other people have suggested, however, he may also want to give you both the best shot at afuture together, and he realizes it won't happen while he is enlisted. Let time work things out for you. It will.
I agree with all of the above, but when I married my husband I had already completed college, and he felt the same as your boyfriend. He felt inferrior to me, so my solution to the problem was to encourage him to earn a degree, which he did. Once he earned his BS we worked on our Masters degree together. Now we are both working on our doctorial degrees. You have to try to put yourself in his situation. If you are bettering yourself, you should encourage him to better himself. You truly have to be self sufficent. There are so many things that you have to do on your own, take care of the household, attend functions that the both of you would normally attend together, make sure the kids are taken care of, thats like being a single parent, etc, etc. So maybe you should talk to him a little more to find out exactly what made him make that comment.
I would not keep trying to marry a man that is trying to convince me it's not a good idea. What is that telling you? You shouldn't have to ';talk'; a man or woman into marriage. good luck to you.
Sounds like he is just using this as an excuse to delay making any further commitments. It really doesn't sound like a problem you can fix. Sorry. I could be wrong especially since I don't know either of you. But since he is settled into CG life and you are about to receive you BS, I don't see how marrying you would ruin your life. With the health care, job stability, housing, and getting to be together and all.
my boyfriend went in the army and he used that as an excuse although i supported his decision. but when he was being sent to iraq he used that as an excuse and ended up breakin up with me and got with another girl =(
Military unions have a high fail rate. Maybe he understands that and doesn't want to get hurt down the line. It could also be that he thinks he might be getting deployed soon. From personal experience, a deployment is very tough on a couple. Keep him near, but be ready for anything.
Just live together and see how that works out